OMG

i finally accomplished a session of yoga by myself. after 15 years of iyengar hatha study and 4 years under the guise of shadow yoga, i have broken that sense of unease and done a set by myself for myself. that is really the hope, i was looking for.

the massage and the biofeedback are just therapies that are topical in its nature. the real health comes from exercising your will to move yourself like the body is designed. it is composed of bone, muscle and blood. the movement of joints, synthesised with the mucles and blood make it a pump that creates the flux of live that materializes your self. until i learnt to move my body in a way that electrifies and tonifies, i was giving the responsibility to someone else.

the search for help and healing has come full circle. why did i fall off the bloody cliff in the grand canyon. one thing i remember, was that to live i had to step into the other side. i could not just stay in mainstream and hope to live well. i had to commit to the search for life.
deepak choprah is still in my mind, his voice saying " in with the light, out with the dark". i remember that was what kept me going through the pain and still i practise those words, as much as i can remember.

i have been blessed with exceptional teachers. they will come, more and more. yet until i use the information that is taught to me for myself, i will be lost.

my teacher, rahasri has gone to mexico to study with her teachers, shandar remete and emma balnaves. she will not teach us until february 2008. so it is important for me to keep up since she will come back with even more information.

three of us are gearing up to study group the information so we can retain and train for her return. satuday mornings 8 am, jOdi and sapna are at my living room. glad to know that we all are committed, and they are as confused about the always changing set as i. yet again , it is the intricity of the movements that keep us excited about the shadow yoga process. really the moves are full of twist and turns, literally and metaphorically.

so today, the years of yoga have prepared me to remember and do the practise. that is a start. i have seriously never owned my practise. today i did.

somedays!

it's like the water is just pouring in from all sides. the water tank in the whistler condo has sprung a leak about an hour ago and there is only so much i can do from vancouver. emails, phone calls and googling. i remember having this event when i first move into my place in whistler and having a water tank incident. that was a while ago and it is not still fresh in my memory banks. ......... i, like you, have had a lot happen in ten years.
i talked to the burton snowboarder tennent, kara, and hopefully the floors will not be too damaged. how much can you do to plastic laminate? i will find out. soon. of course, there is the new tank and then,of course, i will have to go up this week. i had it planned for next week sat/ sun but this energetics wants me there sooner. i will send the reinforcement plumber there to assess and hopefully it will be smoothed out by saturday. and and electrician too, for something else.
which reminds me i better get the condo on my qxci and see if i can work on this dampness. couldn't hurt. cant be there asap but i can still do my best to help, myself especially.

i am glad i took this day off to do not too much. did not cook or clean. got dressed only to go and get rid of boxes of things to vv and of course puttered around the store. you should have seen alex trying to get me a orange hippo the size of his torsal. it was hummungous and it was dirty. he had it in the baby seat in the shopping cart. he even stood in the line with it. he almost was in tears. it was hilarious. pizza and takeout chinese stopped the commotion.
there's more to tell but it just was a slow day and i enjoyed all the nuances of it.

now that i know that there is a war and i have to be the best i can be in the battle for time and sanity this week coming. it is a bloody mercury retrograde for me. not too much but still it is a constant drive to stay prepared and ready for anything. i had not thought too much about this , hoping that it would not rear its force, pass gently. yet it has been happening and i am glad that my events are small. mercury direct is nov. 4 and it does not rectify until nov. 18th.

i can still breath and swallow and stand on my two legs.......like my teachers have taught me. i hope that i can slow down and take each move with heart.

my prayers are with me, and to all of you who read this. be aware.
namaste.

my day coming

i have booked my flight and hotel to spokane to study with dr. jeff spencer, nov. 17/18. looking forewards to it. hope my passport gets to me on time. it is due to me nov. 14 and i leave on the 16th. cutting it close, eh. trisha beauregard will be there too. whatever happens, i am glad to be on this educational search.
the rice fast went well. now a week later, i have a hive rash along my intestinal lines along the shoulders to the back of my hands. it could be the shrimp i ate last sunday or the day long time i spent at a wellness tradeshow for the qxci/epfx device for www.quantumknights.ca . the machine says it is the hair and beauty products. i am sensitive to my life and it shows rather quickly now that my gut has had the shock of monotony for ten days and me eating just back to the regular diet since then. not to say that my life is monotonous. just that the system is quick to announce issues. so the rash started on my shoulders and on the second day is on my hands. i have seen i happen to others. just damn itchy. took some apis mel, some antihistimines and salt baths.
chemically sensitive. use to remember being a child and had the same reactions. to aspirin. to crab and lobster. never this bad but still reactive.
just completed a weekend with my yoga teacher's yoga teacher, emma balnaves. it was a great time. tough and very confronting. glad to have the training but knowing that i will have to do more home stuff. just started reading the iyengar biography for the first time since i have had the book, over 15 years of carting it around and not opening it. it is a great read. hope to have it done quickly and then onto another , the copy of the light on yoga.
i have signed alex up for sunday mountain club in whistler. 15 sundays, lessons, and ski pass for $800. i have bought ten days. i figure i can work a few of those days.
mexico will have to wait till next year to be inputed. i have to make some income to cover myself while i train on the device.